This is rather unfair on my children but is a true story. A good few years ago, my husband was going to have an operation on his foot (not serious, but very much inconveniencing and immobilizing him).

We explained this to our two children, who were around 10 and 12, and told them that life would be a bit different for a few weeks, Mum would have to do all the driving, Dad would need a lot of attention and care, everything would require just a bit more effort – but we would work together as a family, and it would all be fine.

They said of course they would help, of course they wanted to look after their Dad and make sure he was OK.

A short way into the recovery time, I asked them to help with a few extra household chores. They both looked completely taken aback, and said ‘What? Why?’

I said, "there’s a lot to do and I need more help. Remember how you said you would do what you could?"

They laughed at the idea. "But this is nothing to do with Dad in bed," they said. They didn’t quite accuse me of trying to cheat them with this request, but it was close. It turned out they had seen themselves ministering to the invalid, maybe carrying things upstairs to him, fetching him a book, plumping his pillows. But running the household? No. "But think of all the things he does," I said. "We all just have to do a bit more."

After some discussion, this was cleared up and they did take on extra chores, and all was well.

But I often think – we are all like that sometimes, we don’t quite get the ramifications of life, and that taking on something might be more of a commitment than we think. (Hands up everyone who thought when they first had children that they would be able to stop worrying about them one day…) There will be easy bits and fun bits, but also hard bits – just like life itself.

So in theory we want to be nice to each other, we see ourselves as kind, polite people who are generous to those in need. There are always heart-warming stories on social media of good deeds rewarded, worthy and grateful recipients, paying it forward. In practice helping those in need can be more tricky, and they are not always grateful or nice about it: at a basic level maybe they don’t like the food you give them, or perhaps they have views that are abhorrent to you.

But they are still human, still in need, even when it’s inconvenient, and for me Christianity steps in here and says "you still have to respect them and you still have to help them." The Bible reminds you that every human is equally worthwhile, and losing sight of that is a dangerous prospect. In Philippians 2, St Paul says "Let each of you look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others." It is not a flashy way to put it, but it works.

Moira Redmond